Spitzle the Clown

Sometimes it doesn't work out...

2009-08-06T23:36:00.003-04:00

and when it doesn't, a lot of people are thrown for a loop. I use the frustration. It's my fuel. So you got away today. I followed you back to your place. One night, when you're tired, and a little drunk, I'll have my way. You'll hit the light switch inside your door, and it won't come on. With just a little edge, I'll have you.

And then?, I get to release the frustration of losing you the first time.

You've gotten away this time. Enjoy your reprieve. It won't last.

Choices, choices...

2009-08-05T21:26:00.004-04:00

I've got it all set up here for you, my dear. It's a bit like Russian Roulette, but I think more exciting. You may choose between these six syringes. Some of them will leave you feeling quite nicely. The others, however, contain some nasty surprises.

Now, go ahead and pick. Oh, and please don't struggle so, you'll mark up your wrists with rope burn.

I'm waiting just outside.

2009-08-02T21:50:00.002-04:00

Watching you inside, carrying on as normal. It's hard to see the quiver of fear in your hands. It's only perceptible because I know it's there. But you'll do it, won't you? You'll deliver everything I asked because you believe I'll hold up my end. You believe that we'll be even.

When I see him drop to the floor, isn't that what I said? When he drops to the floor, you'll be free. But did you really think I'd keep my word?

Silly fool. The whole deck is stacked against you.

Here, in the dark...

2009-07-29T23:51:00.002-04:00

It's where I always find them. Struggling so hard to be individual, to be interesting, and really, I know them. The ticky tacky little houses they come from, shrines to the mundane and the banal. They want glamour, they want intrigue, they want to be somebody.

Well, I give it to 'em, however briefly. It's one last thrill from me, and I release them from the mediocrity to which they're destined.

When you're a beautiful victim in an unsolved case, you live forever in the press. Nobody said you'd get to enjoy their fame.

Waiting

2009-07-22T23:21:00.002-04:00

Patience is so difficult for people today. For me, the journey is as important as the destination. Yes, the catch is beautiful, the control, the mastery, the money...

But sitting, watching you, learning your routines, slowly forcing my way into your life, these are the real joys of life. Of course, I love the destruction, the personal take-down, the torture, even. Watching you slowly lose control over your own life, nothing beats it.

I followed you home...

2009-07-21T23:33:00.003-04:00

But it's not your home, is it? Who is he?
You know that I'll find out either way. By the time you leave, it's going to be pitch black in your neighborhood. And everyone around there is asleep, so they won't hear you struggle.

And then, you can begin to pay me back. On my terms.

Interactions with the police...

2009-07-17T00:33:00.004-04:00

It's about keeping cool. Not only is nothing wrong, but you're supposed to be where you are, and there's no need to explain yourself. Just because the local constable is searching the area for a certain missing person, just because I'm walking out of the woods at a strange hour, there's no reason to make myself look like a person of interest.

I respond to the questions calmly, face positive, friendly, a small look of empathy when they tell me the reason they're stopping me. "I hope you find her," I tell them with friendly concern, as I go on my way.

And you, what about you? Have you regained consciousness? Are your wrists and ankles bleeding from struggle against your bindings? I'll be back soon, you know, and you'll tell me everything I want to know.

So many memories...

2009-07-15T23:46:00.004-04:00

An out of the way motel, a bottle of booze, a forced lock, a room invasion...it always starts off well. A knife in my hand, daring you to make a noise. The lights stay off as I leave, when you wake up, you'll have so many questions, but the answers have all gotten away with me.

Walter didn't believe me...

2009-07-14T22:34:00.004-04:00

when I told him about my plans for you. He said no one in their right mind would fall for my trap. He said it was too simple, and that you'd get away before I would succeed.

If he could speak right now, I think he'd warn you to be careful.

He shouldn't have doubted me.

I knew when I met you...

2009-07-14T00:46:00.003-04:00

You were ready to give it all up. Maybe it was the lights, maybe it was all the things I told you, but you walked away from a life in an instant. Who did you leave behind? Was there a husband? Did you leave a child circling the carousel as you followed me into the darkness? You were looking for an escape, and I was it. You'll never have to go back there again. You gave up, surrendered to me...and now it's all over. I gave you the release you were afraid to ask for. Will they ever find you ? Will they get to give up like you did? No, their pain has just begun.

When the sun starts to dip...

2009-07-10T17:47:00.004-04:00

Things get a little easier for me. I dip in and out of the shadows, staying on you as you make your way around town. When no one else is around, I'll be on you before you can scream. Nobody will ever notice.

I've been mining for gold.

2009-07-01T22:13:00.002-04:00

I set up some rusty old dental equipment in the back of an abandoned warehouse in the factory district. The sounds of the heavy equipment drown out any noise you can make. Those fillings of yours are going to come out.

What? No, I won't get that much money for them.

Extraction is just a bit of a hobby.

Smooth.

2009-06-30T22:23:00.009-04:00

Tipping me off to the police, you thought that would work? Oh, you bought yourself some time, but there wasn't any real evidence, and they had to drop the case. You knew they would. I've found you now, and I'm learning your new patterns. It's time to pay up, whether or not you've got the cash.

I heard you left town.

2009-05-26T21:07:00.002-04:00

Caroline said you were running away from me. I overheard her at the bar. You told her you needed to get away from "that creepy little clown before he ruins me."

Well guess what. Turns out that town was no good for me, either, so I decided to try some new digs. And you'll never guess who I've found.

You're a dirty little bird, you know that? Well. You're mine now. You don't know it yet, but it's all about to come crashing down on you.

In the News This Morning...

2009-05-25T21:16:00.002-04:00

My contacts are all drying up.

2009-05-17T19:44:00.003-04:00

Something's scaring them off. All the whispers are gone. I've got no information. The 5-0's been sniffing around, and all those weak souls have run away.

Without the intel I need, I can't get as much done. This is NOT how I like to work.

Ugh. This is ridiculous.

2009-05-12T21:06:00.002-04:00

The police have been sniffing around a lot. They've been checking all of my hiding places, rifling through the spoils of my work. It's just undignified.

Somebody has a big mouth. Somebody is the only one who knows these things besides me. It's you. Now I've got no one I can trust, and I'm stuck here in this attic.

You can bet your sweater, though, I'll be out of here soon. And when I am, you'd better hope it's the police that have me because if they don't, you don't have much time left.

You'd better get your affairs in order.

Oh, no!

2009-05-07T22:54:00.002-04:00

What's this?

You can't get up? Oh, how very sad. Oh, my foot's on your chest?

Well then, why don't you hand me your wallet, and then we can talk.

Editor's note:

2009-05-06T22:38:00.002-04:00

Due to a terrific sinus headache, Spitzle is in bed this evening, and will not be committing any mayhem. Please come back in a day or two for more crime without consequences.

It's so satisfying.

2009-05-05T22:44:00.004-04:00

I'm not sure that there's anything better than leaving a crime scene. - my crime scene - just as the police are arriving.

And not a soul stops me. Detectives, indeed.

It's your time...

2009-05-04T23:02:00.004-04:00

And you can see no reasons
'Cos there are no reasons
What reason do you need to die, die?
Oh Oh Oh

I'm getting tired of this town.

2009-05-03T23:22:00.002-04:00

Everybody is so jaded. No one is afraid anymore. Who cares about the money if I'm not making an impact? If I'm not turning up in peoples' nightmares, it's just not fun.

Entertain me.

Oh, dammit.

2009-05-02T00:34:00.003-04:00

I had it all planned out. It was going to be just marvelous. A human game of Mousetrap. But then you had to go and die before the net came down at the end. Now I'm left messing up my beautiful work, making it look like a cheap burglary.

What a mess. I need to choose a better class of victim.

Well look who's woken up...

2009-04-30T23:07:00.002-04:00

I'm so glad you could join us. I was so worried you'd have to watch the video of this online.

Now, you'll be very sore in the morning, but I don't suggest you struggle, you'll only mark up your wrists.

And also, don't think of this as losing everything. Think of it as a lesson in fighting materialism. It'll be better one day...when the wounds have healed, when your insurance has kicked in....

Oh, wait, please tell me you have insurance. I mean, I know you don't have much here, but it'd be awful to have to replace it all from scratch.

Well...let me get on with it then.

Okay...

2009-04-30T00:13:00.003-04:00

I understand what you're doing, and I'm not surprised. You almost make we suggest feel bad, I know you don't want to hurt anyone. I'm not sure I can trust you on a job , though. Even so, you're starting to catch my eye. You're looking a little vulnerable there.

Come with me, I have something to show you..

Some nights...

2009-04-28T20:43:00.004-04:00

It's not always glamorous. Sure there's the thieving, the violation, the destruction.

But many, many nights, that's just not the case. So often, it's leg work. Taking down addresses, license plates...spying PIN numbers...noting habits, comings and goings....it can be a lot of work.

But some nights, nights like tonight, it all pays off...

On a night like tonight, it all falls into place, and it's such a rush, taking everything that you have. From your valuables, to your dignity, to your very sense of self, they're all mine now, and it feels so very good.

I know...

2009-04-27T23:32:00.003-04:00

You thought you were so safe, at home, reading it all at your computer. You never thought I'd be right there, waiting for you when your last light turns off.

Well...

Here I am.

Oh, isn't that funny...

2009-04-25T08:16:00.003-04:00

How incredibly fitting! Oh, I'm sorry for laughing. Don't feel too badly about this. I'm sure someone will miss you.

I love people.

2009-04-23T22:17:00.002-04:00

I love it when you think of all the little security things. If I get the right lock, if I get the right lights, no one will try to rob me.

Mmmhm. You see, that only works with the incidental thief.

What do you get, though, when there's a determined party who wants in? Say, maybe someone like me...maybe I know what you've got. Maybe I want you?

You think your lights, your locks, you think that will keep me out? I almost feel bad for you...
all of that? It only makes it more fun. I thrive on the challenge.

I will squirm past all of your security measures, and I will like every minute of it.

I've been watching you.

2009-04-22T23:09:00.002-04:00

I know the plans you're making, and I have to say, you're making it too easy.

You know about cons, right? There's the mark, the set up, and then you get the mark's money, leaving them feeling like it was their idea to give it to you.

The set up, that's the work. It's kind of satisfying when it goes right. It's like music.

But you, it's like you're doing the setup, on yourself, for me. It's too easy, I'm just gonna march right in and take you for everything you've got.

I almost feel guilty. Almost.

It's nothing new...

2009-04-22T01:21:00.001-04:00

Dark, damp, filled with the scent of fear...I take all my favorite victims here.

You're banking on the neighbors?

2009-04-20T23:02:00.002-04:00

You seriously think that if you scream loud enough, they'll call 911?

Have you ever called 911 from this part of town? Now if you call from a fancier zip code, police'll be there before you're off the phone, but by the time they get around to dispatching someone to the scene, I've gotten everything I came for.

I checked on you in your hospital room.

2009-04-19T22:21:00.002-04:00

You've narrowly scraped through this time. One day, you won't be so lucky, and I'll have to find a new toy.

They'll rule it, "Death by misadventure." I always liked the sound of that.

You know, that day will come sooner rather than later, don't you?

I've got it all figured.

2009-04-18T21:28:00.002-04:00

The old lady goes shopping every Saturday night at 9. I'll just slip in and wait for her. It's so much more fun robbing someone blind when they're there, quite helpless to stop my course of action.

Delicious.

You're done.

2009-04-17T22:47:00.003-04:00

I've been watching you. Working the corners. Selling, slinging, working it. You've shown a real work ethic, the sort of work I'd be proud to call my own.

The thing is...this is my town, and too much business brings the heat. That is something I do not need.

So here's where it stands. In the next life. Ask first. Know your bounds. Show some respect.

Until then, I've got an old Grand Marquis out back. You're going to climb in the trunk, and we're going to take a trip to the swamp. It's gator mating season, so the females are always hungry for live meat.

Check the exits.

2009-04-16T22:33:00.003-04:00

That's what I always say. You want to know where they are before you go in. Get in, get what you want, and get out. Know your exits, know your alternatives.

Of course, if you do everything right, the getaway isn't something to worry about. Eliminate your witnesses, and you can walk right out the front door.

It's a little game I like to play.

2009-04-15T21:55:00.002-04:00

If you don't turn on the light when you come in, I let you live.

When it's all said and done, I can't risk being identified, so if the lights come on, yours go out.

So let's assess, you're tired. It's been a long day at work. "Hump day's over!" you laughing announced while getting drunk at Chili's with your coworkers. You've had a few too many, and you just threw your keys in the tray by the door. Do you leave the lights off, and crawl into bed, or is this it for little...old...you?

How did I let this happen?

2009-04-14T22:32:00.003-04:00

Someone put something in my drink. I don't like this. Things work so much better when I'm in control.

When I find out who did this to me, only one of us will leave the room alive.

Well now, everyone's left...

2009-04-13T17:27:00.002-04:00

There are no witnesses here, no one for you to call out to.

I'll ask you again. Shall we begin now, or will we have to wait until the drugs kick in?

Oh really? Please.

2009-04-12T21:08:00.001-04:00

Don't tell me that a light or two on campus actually make you feel safe. Do you see how much darkness there is around here.

I'm waiting for you.

The joys of apartment buildings...

2009-04-11T22:00:00.002-04:00

I get so many more choices to sample from.

It's so easy to spot the ones who don't think very highly of themselves.

Do you know the things you can get someone like that to do? Goodness, it's fun.

Let's keep this simple.

2009-04-10T23:18:00.004-04:00

I'm not coming back tonight, and I'm not untying you. The last time you followed me, you tipped off all my targets.

If you're still alive until the morning, I have a surprise for you. It'll only be painful at the start.

You may even enjoy it.

You look so peaceful.

2009-04-09T22:53:00.002-04:00

If I didn't know better, I'd say that you were asleep.

I almost feel bad.

2009-04-08T23:18:00.002-04:00

Sometimes, I feel the responsibility is weighing down on me too much.

Then I see all the easy marks - people so careless, it's like they're giving their money away. And I think, "I know, I know, but just one more con, just one more robbery, just one more beating in the alley."

And then, I promise, I'll come back and untie you, and dress your wounds before I tie you back up.

I'm waiting...

2009-04-08T04:03:00.003-04:00

Corners like this, you meet some desperate folks.

I'm talking about people who'll do jobs that I'm not willing to do. And it's amazing, if I have what they want, and I do, I can string them along on dozens of jobs.

Well, that is until they're easily recognized, and then they need to disappear.

Sound familiar? The thing is, I'm almost going to miss you. Almost.

What do you expect?

2009-04-07T02:15:00.003-04:00

Sneaking around time is over. If you haven't picked up on the clues, then you're dumber than you seem.

You must know that you're not getting away tonight, don't you?

You know that all choices are over for you now, right?

Well, you're going to see.

Brace yourself.

I love these nights.

2009-04-05T22:47:00.002-04:00

It's warm out, but not warm enough for your air conditioner.

Listening outside your open window, I can hear the precise moment you drift into sleep.

A simple slit of your screen, and I'm in. When you wake, it will be too late.

You'd think...

2009-04-05T10:03:00.002-04:00

a fella couldn't get away with anything in a place like this. Well lit, big windows. You could attract a lot of attention if you're not careful.

That just shows what you know. Watch this, they'll never know what hit 'em.

Everyone else...

2009-04-03T23:16:00.003-04:00

has passed out around the fire.

That means it's just you and just me. All the way out here in the woods.

Alone.

With no one to hear you, we've got plenty of time. We can make our own scary story. I'll be the maniac, you be the innocent young thing.

I'm sure you'll be screaming until the end, but just think, you'll live on for years in the retelling.

I'm watching you sleep...

2009-04-02T20:54:00.002-04:00

for the last time.

You look so peaceful, I hate to disrupt you. But then again, all things must come to an end.

I've done my research.

2009-04-01T21:08:00.003-04:00

I've been watching you. That abandoned service station across from where you work? Well, it's not exactly empty.

Let's just say it's been an excellent spot for taking notes. I've learned an awful lot about you in the last two weeks.

You don't know it now, but your drive home should be rather surprising.

From up here...

2009-04-01T05:59:00.002-04:00

I can see everything. Look at it, all those people down below.

You know what I see?

Victims, just waiting for me.

Oh, do be quiet!

2009-03-30T21:18:00.002-04:00

It's not enough I've got you tied to the wall and drugged, you still feel the need to babel incessantly?

You make a terrible hostage. Now shut your mouth, or I'm going to stuff something in it.

What are you waiting for?

2009-03-29T22:08:00.003-04:00

Tell me you're not waiting for your white knight. This is it.

You and me. And you have a job to do.

As long as Singleton is still up and walking, you know I can't trust you.

So, load your gun, get out, and do what you have to do. Or you'll never walk free again.

They're going to tear down...

2009-03-29T01:17:00.005-04:00

the old house on Lafayette. They want to build a hotel there. Now, it's no burial site, but with all of the, er, mysterious, deaths there, won't it be crawling with ghosts?

Remember Sharon and Mikey? They were getting too close to my operations. They were never found. And Mr. Steven, the landlord's handyman who found out and was threatening to tell. Oh, what a sad accident he had. One really should be more careful with electricity.

And all of the visitors you brought...were those vagrants you kept bringing home? No one even came looking for them.

Well, time passes, and this town is certainly changing, but I keep changing with it.

I have something for you.

2009-03-27T21:40:00.002-04:00

But you know that, don't you?

You've always known. It's inevitable. You think you have free will, that's what you keep saying.

Really?

That's why you keep coming back here, is it?

You cannot help it. Why do you resist?

Give in, it's so much easier.

You'll have to excuse me a moment.

2009-03-27T03:21:00.002-04:00

I always get a little sentimental in this alley. In the old days, I wasn't the clown you see today. I had so much to learn then!

It was my spot. And the things I used to do in this alley...oh, the memories. The hustle, the booze, the good times. I had to find something more private when the police started finding bodies nearby, but until then! Oh, it was so free in those days!

Oh! I just got goosebumps.

You complain.

2009-03-25T22:05:00.004-04:00

You say that I've locked you up.

Really? Have you seen what it's like out there? It's not safe out there. People are desperate and angry. This is a hurtful world.

Don't you see it? I'm not keeping you from the world. I'm keeping the world from you.

And the sooner you realize that, the sooner you'll give me my due for your protection.

Now keep quiet, or I'll have to tranquilize you again.

This?

2009-03-24T21:54:00.005-04:00

This is what you're holding on to? Look around you. Maybe they're your memories here, but it's certainly not much.

Let go. Your places, your people, your values...what have they done for you, what have they gotten you?

Listen: I have the answers, I can fulfill your potential, make you big, make you great. The thing is, though, you're going to need to let go. You're going to need to do things that you wouldn't do before. Things that scare you, things that offend you, things that you think are dirty, wrong, and awful.

You're just going to have to trust me.

Now take my hand, it's a new day.

I went to visit

2009-03-23T21:26:00.004-04:00

with dear, old Robbie. He started off yelling about money I owed. I softened him up with booze, I shut him up with some H cut with rat poison, and I tossed him in the river and left him for dead. I never did like dear, old Robbie.

The stash is in here.

2009-03-22T20:41:00.005-04:00

Just behind the boiler. It's a terrific hiding place, no one's been in here for ages.

Now, go on ahead of me, that's it,

just...

over...

there...

good. Now turn around, I hate to shoot a person in the back. You can't see the fear and pleading in their eyes.

It's quite an honor!

2009-03-21T20:19:00.002-04:00

I was picked as "Clown of Notable Accomplishment" by my old alma mater, Poughkeepsie Clown and Mime School. I'll be keynote speaker this evening at 9.

Normally, I wouldn't be caught dead at the old grounds, but it's an open bar, and I have some scores to settle.

I plan to knock them dead tonight.

No one uses this back entrance anymore...

2009-03-21T04:10:00.002-04:00

And there's not even a security camera here. Did you know, this elevator only connects to the back door on this floor? There's no hallway access.

You know what that means, don't you? Your shouts, your screams...no one will come running.

One quick shot, that bulb's out, and it's just you and me, here in the dark.

When you wake, here on the floor, I'll have collected your valuables from your apartment and left through the front door.

So that's where you've gone to.

2009-03-20T00:05:00.003-04:00

Well, I guess it makes sense. The red light, a symbol of the only thing you've ever been good at.

And you were good at that. You were always good at that.

Did you think I wouldn't find you? You're easy to follow. I can smell your disgusting perfume from here.

I'll let him get away. This isn't his fault. But I can't let you walk away from this, not this time. They'll think I've gone soft, and I can't afford that.

Watching you drive away...

2009-03-18T21:51:00.002-04:00

So this is what winning feels like? That's it? You just leave it all behind, take a suitcase, and I bask in your tail lights, keeping everything you've left behind?

Where's the satisfaction in that? Well I'll tell you, there is none.

And you don't get off that easily. Concession is not an option. I'll be keeping tabs on you, and when the time is right, I'll be back, and you? You'll twitch, and you'll be crying uncle long before I decide I've won.

The old alma mater...

2009-03-17T20:31:00.002-04:00

You might think a fellow like me wouldn't cotton too much to rigid schooling, but you'd be wrong.

Oh, I learned so much in those halls, sitting with rapt attention, watching the nuns. Watching, and desperately learning from them.

They had so much to teach me about control, intimidation, and even pain. Oh, they were impressive women.

I still get tingly when I think about the day that I first put my lessons to practice. I was a bit clumsy at first, but I soon had it down. I practiced on the neighborhood children, and later on my very own teachers. It was then that the student became the master.

And did they ever beg, oh! the joy of it, the power. If only those teachers had lived for me to thank them for the lesson.

But then, that would've ruined the point, wouldn't it?

Tourism

2009-03-16T21:41:00.002-04:00

You hear some locals complain about the tourists in our area. Sure, sure, they're slow, they don't know where they're going, and they're always slowing traffic.

Frankly, this is exactly why I love the tourists. They're a font of opportunity. If you want to see a group of people who don't have it together, who aren't watching their assests...look for someone with a map in one hand and a camera in the other.

You may criticize, you may say I'm shooting fish in a barrel. I'll tell you this...when you need easy cash, you can't beat thieving from an addled traveler.

Oh!

2009-03-15T21:55:00.003-04:00

Somebody wants a game of chase!

Clever, clever, escaping from your bindings. Bad, bad! Well, well, you've got more spirit in you than I thought.

I can't imagine you've gotten too far in your condition, but even so, the game should be fun.

And dragging you back to your punishment will be even moreso.

It is a terrible thing.

2009-03-14T23:48:00.006-04:00

Watching a house burn like this. All the lost dreams, all the irreplaceable memories. The firefighters are saying it looks like the cat may have knocked over some ancient space heater.

Did you even have a space heater? Well, at this point, I'm sure you can't tell them any more. What a pity.

But,

I guess that leaves me off the hook.

You and me...

2009-03-14T04:02:00.004-04:00

We're gonna take over this town. I have ideas...ideas, plans, and knowledge.

It will work.

You will have to do things, things that you're not used to. Things that you don't like. You'll think you aren't ready. You'll be frightened.

Just remember. Remember to think of what we'll have when you do them.

Remember what will happen...if you don't.

Here in the dark...

2009-03-12T22:02:00.002-04:00

I can see so much better. When you take out all the visual noise, it all becomes so clear.

Comings, goings, power, weakness...they shine bright for me at night. I can see the things that others can't

I take advantage .

I exploit every weakness.

Oh! You're awake.

2009-03-11T22:20:00.002-04:00

Good. I want you to know who did this to you.

You'll flash back on this night for years to come. And when you shudder in fear, it's my face you'll see flashing in your mind's eye.

You've given up.

2009-03-10T20:41:00.002-04:00

Look at your sign. Did you really mean it when you put it up?

It's almost too easy. It's making me sad. Where's the fight? Where's the planning? There's no glory here, no honor.

Then again....an easy payday, I can't say I'm one to turn up my nose.

This town stinks.

2009-03-09T22:42:00.003-04:00

It smells like corruption, rotten ambition, and broken dreams.

It's the type of place where you can only get ahead by tromping on the body of the guy you just stabbed.

A place like this, you only get what you want by deception, by force, or some combination of the two.

I call it home, and I'm in charge here.

It's been a busy week...

2009-03-08T23:49:00.003-04:00

and the little piggy ears are all pricked up, trying to pick up the buzz on all the activity.

Good timing to lay low. I could use a rest. I'm staying in tonight with some ice cream, and a copy of the Notebook on Blu-Ray, and a box of tissues.

Go to trial?

2009-03-07T22:48:00.003-05:00

Have some faith in me, please. If we were to get caught...if their police work were at all competent...

What makes you think that they'd be able to take it to trial? You must admit, I'm so very good at eliminating witnesses. That leaves just you, and just me.

And my alibi is airtight. So if I were you, I'd consider showing a little loyalty...
right...
about...
now.

"Why?"

2009-03-07T01:30:00.003-05:00

That's what they ask me. all frightened eyes and shaking limbs. That's the question on their trembling lips: "Why?"

Well, that's easy: It's all I've ever done.

So far,

2009-03-05T22:13:00.002-05:00

I've done nothing permanent. True, your wrists look a mess from struggling against your ropes.

But look at your lovely face, your beautiful body. I haven't done anything permanent, and I won't.

So long as you cooperate.

I see you in there.

2009-03-04T22:13:00.002-05:00

In the living room...watching reality television.

Why don't you come out where I'm waiting? My reality is much more real. Come have a taste of it.

This spot...

2009-03-03T22:12:00.004-05:00

looks perfect to collapse. Laying, all cuddled up with my balloon animals.

Your cold, lifeless body, all decorated in blood, sits just yards away, inside one of those foreclosed homes that no one's been in for months.

Well.

Almost no one.

Ever since...

2009-03-02T22:38:00.002-05:00

the police started following me, I've had to be more careful with my communications.

They'll never figure out my codes, though. They can't count to 12 without taking their shoes off. By the time they figure it all out...

I'll be gone with the money and the stash, and they'll be stuck solving a dozen extra murders.

Well, I have to give it to you.

2009-03-02T02:02:00.003-05:00

You got pretty far. You've got a lot of spirit. It almost makes me want to let you go.

Well, too bad. You've got work to do. Now get in the wheelbarrow...you'll take to long to walk back on those broken toes.

What makes us who we are?

2009-02-28T22:34:00.002-05:00

Is it our ancestors' genetic code, the training when we're young? You know, the old argument, nature, nurture...

And what of adulthood, are we the product of our experiences, a collection of memories? What?

Maybe we're just skin bags, filled with tissues, greedily reaching for stimulus and comfort.

And when we're gone, what are we? Memories in the ether? A collection of peoples' lives who we touched?

Or maybe when you die, you're just the $27 I found in your wallet, the 40 bucks I got pawning your watch, and a messy brownish spot on the sidewalk. A spot that'll mostly wash away over time.

But I'll still be able to make out where it is.

It's Friday night.

2009-02-27T21:41:00.003-05:00

People are out drinking spirits, and they're getting sloppy. It's time for a little wallet liberation.

Afterward, I should be able to collect an easy subject for retraining. The last one chewed through her ropes and got away.

Okay, let's go over the list...

2009-02-26T22:14:00.003-05:00

Her body's in the trunk, you burned their documents, I pulled his teeth and cut off his fingertips. That's everything, isn't it?

Well then. Get in the car...it's time for us to go.

New horizons await!

It's just in here.

2009-02-25T21:58:00.002-05:00

It's not much. You, me, a mattress, a bottle of gin.

Just try to ignore the, um, others. They can't bother you here. With what they're on, they don't even know they're here.

Now if you promise to be good, I'll loosen the ropes.

They say:

2009-02-24T23:38:00.002-05:00

"You can't go home again." Well they're wrong. You can go home again, any time you want.

Just don't expect your things to be there anymore. I've taken care of them.

You think...

2009-02-24T03:54:00.005-05:00

that your wavy bathroom glass provides privacy? Hmm.

Well, keep thinking it: One of the cars left your driveway half an hour ago. From the sound of it, several suitcases were being loaded into the backseat. Someone's not coming home tonight. Secondly, I could well make out your slender frame before you turned out the light and left the bathroom. And just last week, I paid the neighborhood kid - the one you underpay to feed your cat when you're gone, money can get you loyalty - to tell me where you keep your spare key.

So. Privacy?

I think you're just about out of privacy. See you in a moment.

You followed ME here?

2009-02-22T23:38:00.003-05:00

How charming. You're like a little puppy. So let me get you a leash and collar.

You need to be trained.

Well, isn't that nice?

2009-02-22T12:25:00.005-05:00

Someone's gone and made a tribute page to me. Take heart, my little disciple. I'll back-track your location, and we'll do some pain tolerance experiments. It'll be such fun.

For me.

I watched your neighbor...

2009-02-21T00:30:00.005-05:00

when she was punching in her code, I got your apartment number from the junk mail overflowing the trash can near the boxes, and your door's no match for my picks. You may realize what's going on, but only once it's too late.

It's your family, they trust you.

2009-02-19T20:58:00.003-05:00

You don't have to betray them for long. Just keep talking like everything's normal. Distract them. Tell one of your little stories. They love that. Once I get the needles in, they'll be out cold, and you'll be free to go.

You won't owe me anything anymore, I promise.

You trust me, don't you?

I like to wait outside of bars.

2009-02-18T21:35:00.003-05:00

Drunken, stumbling patrons make life so easy. I take their wallets, I take their jewelry, I take their dignity. It's almost like it's waiting for me on a platter.

A little re-wiring...

2009-02-17T21:35:00.003-05:00

and some special charges...your house is ready to go up in a flash. All Halloween orange and chimney red.

Pyrotechnics can be such a rewarding hobby.

There's nothing better...

2009-02-16T20:07:00.005-05:00

than a person who's given up hope. They'll give up everything and more. Desperation makes for a willing accomplice.

Now take my hand, I'm in charge now. I'll make it all better.

Oh, good, you're home.

2009-02-15T22:17:00.002-05:00

And I see from the driveway that you're alone.

Well.

You were alone.

I heard...

2009-02-15T00:31:00.003-05:00

that they ruled his death an accident. I'd be a little offended, if it weren't so convenient for me.

I saw you go in there with him.

2009-02-13T21:17:00.004-05:00

Remember, if you're not out in 20 minutes with his wallet, I'm coming in after you.

I don't know...

2009-02-12T17:59:00.003-05:00

that I would call it poisoning. I will say that the pills I slipped you produce some interesting side effects.

Just behind this wall...

2009-02-11T22:52:00.003-05:00

I've got the most interesting devices. I can show you, but I'll need to restrain you first. We can't have you running away before we're through, can we?